It's been a while

Wow, the saying is true.  The older you get, the faster time goes.  My last post was in March, it is now July.  I have a CT Scan coming up here in a few weeks.  I'll keep everyone posted on that, but back to where I left off.

So Treatment 1 done.  I'm thinking, that was easy.  Not too bad.  Until the ride home.  I barely made it to the bathroom in my house before I got sick.  Six and one half hours it finally stopped. Of course I always get asked, why didn't you go to the ER?  Well, at that time I worked in the ER.  I know how that goes.  I didn't want to be "that patient" that came in after the first chemo.  Also being a medic, I am stubborn and I tough everything out until I can't take it anymore. The next morning I call the oncologist and we changed some meds around so that hopefully that wouldn't happen again.

Throughout the next 11 treatments (every other week for 4-6 hours) I fought hard.  But, I am not invincible.  I was tired, in pain and admitted to the hospital twice during the next 6 months.  Half way through my treatments I had a PET scan and the chemotherapy seemed to be doing its job by ridding my body of the cancer.

Unable to work during treatment was also hard for me. There were days I felt great! There were days I felt like absolute shit.  Sometimes I would eat, sometimes I wouldn't.  Unfortunately due to the steroids, I did not lose any weight.  I actually gained 45 pounds going through treatment.  Which has been a very hard thing for me in the present day.  

Appointments every week, chemo every other week, CT Scans, PET Scans, feeling sick, no hair (anywhere), nothing tasting like anything.  Etc, Etc.   I was so sick & tire of being sick & tired.  I didn't want to have any more treatment.  I just wanted to go to sleep and wake up better.  A breakdown of major proportions.  I just wanted to give up.  Chemo sucks the life out of you, literally.  It kills all of the fast growing cells in you body.  New and old.  

Officially Diagnosed Officially a Warrior

Over the next few days, I endured many tests to prepare me for what my treatment might be. A bone marrow biopsy, MUGA scan, PET Scan, lots of labwork, also having a Mediport inserted.  After all of this, it was determined that I had Stage 2B (extensive) Hodgkin's Lymphoma.  I was to undergo chemotherapy.  ABVD x 12 treatments every other week.  

(A - Adriamycin B - Bleomycin V - Vinblastine D - Dacarbazine) First treatment scheduled for Wednesday, April 28, 2010.  Each treatment lasts about 4-5 hours.  

In preparation for the many side effects of treatment, I prepared myself.  I had my hair cut short so that when it started to fall out, I could just have it shaved off.  I purchased some hats, and caps for sleeping, etc.  I purchased a newer iPod so that I could download podcasts to listen to during treatment.  Tank tops were essential so that the nurses could easily access my port.  

My friends & family determined that they would take turns taking me to treatment.  That really meant a lot to me.  I was not alone.  The day finally arrived.  Treatment 1.  I can do this.  I am a strong stubborn woman on a path to recovery.  I show up at the Moll Cancer Center & there is a large sign made of poster board taped to the front door.  It is from my co-workers.  It said This is "Mel's Center" We are here with you every step of the way.  Love your ED (emergency department) Friends!  That boosted my spirits to know my work family cared so much for me.  Also, one of the Dr's wives made dinner for me & my family! I just didn't know how to express my gratitude.  I also didn't know what a long hard   road I was going to travel.  

Just as things were going well

It took me quite some time to get over the fact of not being able to run squad or be on call with the fire department any more.  Although I am still certified (I can't give it up) it just isn't the same.  I do participate in some events at the annual Firemen's Convention & I look forward to that every year.  

Working in the ER was my life.  I loved what I did there.  After a while, 12 hours shifts, every other weekend, every other holiday... It gets exhausting.  I remember lying in bed on Friday, April 02, 2010 stretching my shoulder.  I had this feeling that something was pressing on my vocal cords.  As I felt my neck I discovered a large lump in-line with my clavicle.  I asked Ron (my boyfriend) if he felt it as well.  His thought was ask one of the ER docs to look at it tomorrow at work.  His suggestion was to see my family Dr just to be on the safe side.  

On Monday, April 05, 2010 I saw my primary physician and he ordered some labwork & a CT scan.  I wasn't scheduled to work until Thursday, so when I went in Thursday I had my labs drawn & a CT scan.  My Dr called me in the ER, he stated that my labwork was ok, but I needed additional CT scans.  Was I scared? Yes.  But I went back to CT and had the additional testing.  It was determined that I needed to see an ENT (ear, nose, throat) to biopsy the enlarged lymphnode in my neck.  It was going to be some time before I could get in to see him.  Friday morning (April 9) I went into work a little early to let my manager know that I was going to be having a bunch of testing.  She was not in, but the Director of the ER was.  I let him read my CT results, and let him know I had an appointment with the ENT in a few weeks. He immediately picked up the phone and called the office of the ENT.  The ENT physician was already aware that he was going to be seeing me.  He instructed the director to have me come straight to his office.  

My boyfriend met me at the ENT office.  I was so relieved about that.  Because at this point I am really scared of what I could have.  My outlook on things has always been if something is wrong, stick a needle in it, cut it off or laser it.  (thanks to my friend/physician Karen) A needle biopsy was performed right in the office.  I was also put on his surgery schedule for Wednesday, April 14, 2010.  I was asked if I could take the specimens back to the hospital lab (since the courier wasn't coming till late afternoon).  I took the specimens straight to the lab & asked them to run them right away.  I then went and saw my supervisor & and filled out FMLA paperwork to be on leave for my surgery and for recovery time after.  

While just arriving home (after many errands) I received a call from my Hematologist.  (this was a little strange since I hadn't seen him about any of this) I was then informed that my biopsy was positive for a blood cancer - Hodgkin's Lymphoma.